How to Be a Good Team Player

Photo by Francesco Ungaro courtesy of Pexels

The first thing needed for team play is to be on your own team and be connected to yourself so you are able to notice what you need from moment to moment. First, be the leader of yourself. As a raregiver, you coordinate lots of different people from family members to medical professionals, and you need skills to be an effective leader. These may include being a good listener, offering validation, bringing curiosity and refraining from being critical to name a few.

Managing Teams

Your medical team is one of your most important teams after your family team. Your primary care doctor is the leader of your medical team and it is important for this doctor to be tuned to the needs of your Rare child as well as to your needs. It's important for them to be able to communicate with you and to answer your questions thoughtfully because you are an important player on the team.

Marriage

Marriage is also a team and you and your husband or partner may have gotten good at working together because you have the same goals (doing what is best for your Rare child), you are supportive of one another and have a positive attitude. It's essential to play to each other's strengths and remember, humor is key. In moments of stress or challenge, humor can disperse tension with ease. When you are collaborating and things are flowing, you might even feel like you are moving together like a school of fish. Feel the cohesiveness and the easy flow and appreciate it.

Acceptance

Another important element of good team play is acceptance. Let people be as they are and don't try to control them. No one likes to be controlled or bossed around. Be curious and ask open door questions. Receive what is being offered and be grateful. It can be easy to fall into patterns of focusing on where someone falls short or noticing what they have not done, which is ultimately not helpful. Look for what's working and emphasize that.

Your School Team

There are teachers, administrators as well as medical professionals on your team at school. Raregivers will attend multiple IEP meetings if their Rare child attends public school. These can be challenging at best. Lead the team by gracefully showing them how to collaborate. If they say they cannot help your child, you can receive this and then invite them to think outside the box. Maybe there is a workaround inside the confines of a very tight educational system. One communication phrase that is very effective is "Would you be willing to…?" Let the people in the meeting know that you appreciate what they are already doing for your Rare child. Appreciation is the secret sauce to any strong team.

Join Us

Coming up next week – Vulnerability: A Pillar of Authentic Communication 

Description:  This week we will explore the ways being a raregiver renders you vulnerable. Raising a child with a multitude of physical vulnerabilities points us to the vulnerable nature being human. Taking a risk to be transparent about your experience and share what you like and where you are challenged takes courage. Discover the strength in vulnerability and how to skillfully communicate your feelings and needs. As Brene’ Brown says, "Staying vulnerable is a risk we have to take if we want to experience connection." Come and bring your vulnerable heart to a safe space where you can connect with other Raregivers.

Please Join Us for the Women's Empowerment Circle every Tuesday at 10am PST

You may not realize how much you need the Raregivers community until you find it.

Zoom Link: https://us02web.zoom.us/j/88974713173

We look forward to being with you soon.

𓆩♡𓆪 𓆩♡𓆪 𓆩♡𓆪