Becoming A Juggler: As You Adjust (with or without) a Diagnosis
By Padma Gordon
As a caregiver it can feel as though there is a constant juggling act of tasks and responsibilities to manage. The challenges of keeping everything going and the desire not to drop a ball so to speak becomes a daily life circus, but what happens when everything has to drop to manage the task at hand? The emergency or doctors appointment or attention that must be given, requires the caregiver to practice presence and grace for what may need to fall in order to manage the most present need. This circus of life can feel overwhelming at times as the one juggling it all it.
It is important to remember some balls will have to drop and that is okay. Care giving, particularly for a rare disease, requires you to pick up dozens of balls at once. These balls aren't all the same though and it is important to understand the difference. There are crystal balls, these are crucial, they represent health, safety and essential medications, if these drop they can break, so these become the top priorities.
The rubber balls, these are the tasks that can wait, such as household tasks, dishes, laundry, or responding to texts and emails. These balls can bounce back, be picked up later or sometimes dropped indefinitely. The invisible balls, these are the ones that are most dangerous to drop, but often get overlooked, your own health, sleep and emotional well-being!
Some days, you will feel like a master circus performer, juggling it all with ease, other days you may feel like a circus clown stumbling around with balls scattered everywhere. Both are okay! This is a journey that will change you, but it also allows your compassion, strength and sense of self to expand in unexpected ways. Remember, you are doing your best, and that is enough. Your best will look and feel different each day, depending on how much sleep you've gotten, what else you are juggling, etc. It is important to remember to also prioritize your own needs and work towards creating small rituals of self care.
Remind yourself to pause and take deep breaths to ground and calm your nervous system through the day to maintain a sense of clarity and presence. Seek support when and where you can. Prioritizing self care is not selfish, it is essential and a necessity to maintaining your resilience and ensuring long term care for your loved one.
Prioritize your sleep as much as you can and do your best to schedule time for yourself weekly. Some small rituals you can offer yourself, especially if your "me time" may be limited, are prioritizing movement, gentle yoga or a walk around the block can help boost endorphins and improve mood. Practicing mindfulness, such as deep breathing or guided meditation can help to manage stress and calm the mind and body. Journal your feelings to help process complex emotions and give you a space to get it all out. Remember to celebrate small wins, acknowledging personal and self care related accomplishments, no matter how small they seem.
Coming up next week: April 28: We’re In This Together! –Team Play: A Communication Toolkit
Please Join Us for the Women's Empowerment Circle every Tuesday at 10am PST.
You may not realize how much you need the Raregivers community until you find it.
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We look forward to being with you soon.
